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Nicole’s neurotic Notebook

Confused

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This I knew was coming since last week, what I didn’t know was the email I got late yesterday saying that I have a Microsoft teams meeting on Wednesday to meet with all of the HR people that I talked with or have been made part of this discussion, plus the original guy from the Pride Alliance. It’s supposed to be a wrapup meeting so, I can go over all we go through today.

OK....I guess........why not.......then .....I see an extra name on the list. 🧐

They also invited the HR person for my region ......who I have known for years now. Same person who also talks every day with my regional manager and from time to time with my branch manager.🤯.
I was very specific to tell them, “upper management can know, but nobody from my region“ Now I’m supposed to believe and trust that she won’t go and tell any of them............I’m a little bit freaked out if I can trust her. 😲

To me, it’s much easier to tell somebody who you’ve never met than the acquaintance who’s known you for years. Family members and friends have some love for you to start with, this gives you something to work with. Work acquaintances don’t care enough to have that love. They tend to be much more judging. If I’m going to tell somebody like this, Id like to tell them myself and not have it leaked out before I have the meeting. Just shook me up, at a time Im questioning whether I have enough fortitude even get through this. 😔

It’s tough enough at this point knowing that I don’t have control over most things, but it annoys me further when someone takes away the little bit of control I do have. All of this just makes me feel like they’re speeding up the process that I don’t want sped up yet. I need to go through this piece by piece not all at once. So today I want to put my business face on ( but as Nicole😉), same with tomorrow.
I need to go in there and control the room, need to take back control of the situation ASAP.

Time to find my inner strength.......

Hugs
Nicole

Hi Nicole,

I know it is scary, but it looks like they are trying to accommodate you. Like Allie said, they want to look good and inclusive at the end of this. Just take a deep breath and relax. Tell them how you want this to go and let them know your fears about information flow. YOU GOT THIS!

HUGS,
Mike
 

NicoleT

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My 1st meeting is over, me and a HR guy. And we did it on a fake zoom site. So he got to see me face-to-face for the first time. Apparently the same thing goes for the meeting I have with the group tomorrow.

At first I thought I should be nervous that he’ll see me ......then I thought to hell with it.
I go out as myself each day ...It’s Time to own this. I believe I looked pretty decent. Now as for the meeting with the group tomorrow......... I’m gonna start early...... I want to look “fierce.”...Lol...

@TonyaJanelle ....love the comic strip...great site....lol.

@Linde ........ Yeah I have noticed a few women who talk the same, usually though they smoke about four packs a day....
Hugs
Nicole, I know you will handle that meeting with aplomb, don’t be too phased by your regional HR person being there, but make your point that your transition at work needs to be at your pace. Let them know that you have concerns about information flow and the possible downturn in sales. This will put the onus on them to find alternate solutions. They will want to help you as you are going to vastly improve your companies inclusion credentials, so don’t think it’s all about them helping you.

You got this!

Hugs,

Allie
@OzGirl ....... You always have a gold nugget or two when you post something, I love that about you. It is me helping them also. My meeting today went quite well and I really think I taught him some things. He also give me a heads up as to how I might be able to break into the HR department down the road.
😉👍........The bigger meeting is tomorrow at noon. Followed by my councilor.......

I haven’t had this many people of Authority and significance, talk about me, in that short a period of time since I put gum in a little girls hair when I was five.
(And in my defense .........she did grow up to be quite the bitch....)

I’ll let you know how that goes.........
(not the girl and gum, charges are still pending there......may have to clean the chalk board🤨 or write I’m sorry 300 times📝..............I’ll let you know about the meeting)

🤗

Hi Nicole,

I know it is scary, but it looks like they are trying to accommodate you. Like Allie said, they want to look good and inclusive at the end of this. Just take a deep breath and relax. Tell them how you want this to go and let them know your fears about information flow. YOU GOT THIS!

HUGS,
Mike
@Confused .......thank you... They are trying to accommodate me and they’ve been pretty good so far. I guess I just fear of them taking over control and starting with the meeting I had today I’m taking that control back. This is my timeline this is my transition ......let’s get this thing right.

It’s hard to get over my fears ............but I guess the only way to get past them is through them.
Hugs


One quick note about the meeting. I found out earlier this week that our insurance coverage does not cover GCS. 😤....Ever since then, The head of the pride alliance has been on the phone working with them to try and accommodate that request. No changes have been made in the insurance policy yet, but it’s great to know they’re working for it.

Nicole
 

TonyaJanelle

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One quick note about the meeting. I found out earlier this week that our insurance coverage does not cover GCS. 😤....Ever since then, The head of the pride alliance has been on the phone working with them to try and accommodate that request. No changes have been made in the insurance policy yet, but it’s great to know they’re working for it.
Is it excluded or requires a prior authorization? Excluded they'd need to change the policy. PA you will meet the requirements no problem.
 

Lexxi

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@OzGirl ....... You always have a gold nugget or two when you post something, I love that about you.

@NicoleT,

@OzGirl always has those gold nuggets because they're just laying on the ground where she lives. All she has to do is stoop down and pick them up. I've heard gold nuggets are so plentiful there that all Australians carry a pocket or purse full everywhere they go. ;)😅🤪🤩
I haven’t had this many people of Authority and significance, talk about me, in that short a period of time since I put gum in a little girls hair when I was five.
(And in my defense .........she did grow up to be quite the bitch....)
I've heard 👂that gum in the hair causes that....being a bitch (🐕) I mean. So everyone who's ever been the recipient of her bitchiness has you to thank right. 🤪;) 😈🤟

Luv ya,

Lexxi
 

NicoleT

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Is it excluded or requires a prior authorization? Excluded they'd need to change the policy. PA you will meet the requirements no problem.
@TonyaJanelle ......yeah I think it’s just excluded so....they may need to change policy....who knows
Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Baby Yoda speaks! (Off in the distance, the chant of the Ewoks can be heard.)
@Moni .....LMAO....😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂....your such an iddiot....lol.....the Ewoks really....I laugh so hard it hurt....damn you.....just too funny....
@NicoleT,

@OzGirl always has those gold nuggets because they're just laying on the ground where she lives. All she has to do is stoop down and pick them up. I've heard gold nuggets are so plentiful there that all Australians carry a pocket or purse full everywhere they go. ;)😅🤪🤩

I've heard 👂that gum in the hair causes that....being a bitch (🐕) I mean. So everyone who's ever been the recipient of her bitchiness has you to thank right. 🤪;) 😈🤟

Luv ya,

Lexxi
@Lexxi ...I’ll take credit, why not. All I can say is “ Her poor husband”.. ( this one not the first 3....true story)
as for @OzGirl nuggets...the Australian gold is legendary, some ride sharks to spread there golden knowledge throughout the coastline, others sit like God in the clouds watching over the pure gold below. It’s all possible in the land down under......(they have everything but Ewoks.... Apparently they follow around me chanting)
 

KimOct

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Regarding GCS and insurance it's the time of year selecting coverage. See what options are available through work. But even if none covers it then you can switch insurance in 2021 then you could do GCS in 14 months. It would probably take that long to get to the front of a surgery waiting list anyway. Additionally WPATH guidelines call for living for a year full time before GCS so you are putting the cart before the horse. And you need letters from 2 therapists to qualify for GCS. You are not going to get those until you have been full time for a year.

This takes time so having a plan is good. And then life happens and you change the plan.

Take one bite at a time. Right now the focus is coming out at work and changing your name and birth certificate. That's plenty. Then the GCS came come after that.
 

Kenna

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And you need letters from 2 therapists to qualify for GCS. You are not going to get those until you have been full time for a year.
I haven't investigated GCS as yet, but according to the advice I received for my orchie to comply with WPATH, I needed one letter dated within 3 months of planned surgery and one within 12 months of the planned surgery confirming 12 months of HRT and that surgery was appropriate. In practice I had both letters dated within a couple of weeks of surgery and I only had about a month's notice of the date of my surgery. The psychologist who originally recommended my HRT wanted to see me in order to update his previous letter together with me, giving some basic background and confirming when I started HRT, and I had a new referral to a psychiatrist who I saw two and one month ahead of the surgery. My GP, who prescribes my HRT, had also written a referral to the surgeon about 4 months prior to the actual surgery that stated the date he first prescribed HRT. My surgery was about 6 weeks after my 12 month HRT anniversary during a small break in Covid related bans on elective surgery.
 

Linde

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I did not need any letters, etc. for my orchi, because I had a medical condition.
To be even accepted for my preop for the bottom surgery, I needed a letter from my therapist, and a letter from a PhD psycholigist, as well as pharmacy data indicating that I was at least one year on estrogen.
Once I had the medical examination, I got onto the waitimg list, on which I am still on.

Hugs
Linde
 

NicoleT

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Yeah I figured I’d have to wait. They sure do put you through hoops though. @KimOct is right just one step at a time. When the time comes ..........I’ll be ready. Until then I’ll just write poems for Kimmy.
 

NicoleT

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@KimOct

Poems for Kimmy

There once was a hag
who liked to play verbal tag
bragged that she owned a jag
then she hit a bit of a snag
as unfortunately her funds did lag
so she took a picture for a mag
but since her boobs did sag
and see was a bit of a nag
most people thought she was on the rag

😜

- author
Baby Yoda
 

NicoleT

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OK I’ve got to stop the nonsense I’ve got a meeting that’s quite important coming up in 30 minutes.
I get to meet with the heads of HR for my company..5 other people live on camera. One A witch knows me but has never seen me dressed like this. Time to get my game face on......

Just that My future hangs in the balance.........

*breathe*
Hugs
 

Donica

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OK I’ve got to stop the nonsense I’ve got a meeting that’s quite important coming up in 30 minutes.
I get to meet with the heads of HR for my company..5 other people live on camera. One A witch knows me but has never seen me dressed like this. Time to get my game face on......

Just that My future hangs in the balance.........

*breathe*
Hugs
Breathe! You got this Nicole. Enjoy the moment.
 

NicoleT

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OK sorry for the delay, I got busy this afternoon. So here I am in a meeting of seven people including myself. The president of the HR department at work, The president of business resource groups and cultural inclusion, both HR representatives for the Texas region, The guy I spoke with yesterday ( HR Guy), and of course The chair of The Pride Alliance. This turned out to be a full video chat. So as I do on most video chats. They got the full honest to goodness pure truth. They got Nicole in full force.
My work face was on...” Nicole style” Making my company debut as myself.
7B295256-2B1F-4C05-BED6-FFF4D96B915D.jpeg.........Long story short....I killed it. They even cried. I was told that my positivity is infectious, my bravery is commended, and that they stand behind me 100% to make this successful.😢......Wow just great. We went over timelines, talked about training with diversity, things that I may find offensive, positive questions people can ask, training for the managers. My ideas were in front. I laid it on pretty thick that I am looking to move up with this company, management possible, moving to HR at some point, help with diversity. Still blown away that the woman I was the most scared of who was my HR for my region is the one who cried first. She told me I was inspiring to her. 😳.... Really great meeting, long story short, they are very much behind me and they know that doing this is going to be a challenge not only on the branch level but also with customers. But......hey.......
First time presenting as myself in front of company employees✅
Company standing behind me with who I am✅
Full support from the president of HR, ✅
the HR of my division ✅
HR of my region ✅
the president of cultural diversity ✅
Overall pretty good day. I even spoke to my boss this afternoon and told him I need to have a meeting in private, maybe take a lunch together, he was very positive looking at next week. I’m still in shock I never thought I would actually go through this or ever actually get this far I never thought I would ever transition in my life. Who knew........

Hugs
Nicole
 

Confused

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CONGRATULATIONS Nicole!

Hugs,
Mike
 
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