Fight for self love!
- Feb 1, 2020
- Gender Pronouns
- She, Her, Hers, Herself
- Gender Identity
It does seem to be a common allergy for surgeons, needed revisions!
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There's a Facebook page I am on where the subject of discussion is the trainer aircraft that I flew in the air force. One of the regular posters there is the first (along with two of her classmates) female pilot in the air force. I was there when she was a student plot, and I remember her quite well. She became quite famous.
I have posted on the FB group for a while. When swapping flying stories on the group, I have never hesitated to give the dates of my experiences. So the lady who was the first female pilot has seen me talking about flying before she graduated. And I know that she has seen my posts because she has 'liked' many of them. I figured that she must guessed about my gender.
So today, I sent her a friend request, which she accepted. She had, indeed figured out my background, and had it confirmed by a mutual friend, to whom I had come out last year.
What I especially like about this is that it was no big deal to her.
And that has been the case with all my military friends from the old days. Back then, coming out as transgender would have gotten me a lot of hatred and bullying, as well as getting me kicked out of the air force. Today, those exact same people are older and wiser, and totally accepting. Society is indeed changing for the better.
I know that is not the case everywhere, but I think there is hope for the future.
I'm glad you are seeing that acceptance Kathy! When one interacts with others after a transition begins, there is always the question of how much explanation happens. "Am I better going into more discussion or do I just let things proceed organically?" At the very beginning I was kind of wanting to explain things a lot. After the initial period, I kind of was judging by other people's reactions how to go. In the the end, in my case, it isn't discussed or referred to at all. On one hand, that is just what I want. On the other hand, I don't want people to be afraid of the subject. For my job, we have training we do regarding overcoming internal prejudices. We have a discussion group and there is a mix of backgrounds in the group. One African American woman and myself offered up conversation. I could see that a lot of the older white members, people who I know are awesome people, were way too quiet. They were afraid of saying the wrong thing. I don't want people to feel that way about me or trans people. Sorry, I got on a tangent there. Guess I just wanted to point out the choices one face as to how much to say. Obviously, I'm choosing a lot right now. lol
Well, I made an appointment for pelvic floor physio for the first week of January. I don't have great hopes for its success, but it is indeed possible that it will help. At any rate, it will kill some time while waiting to get in line for a revision.
I asked for recommendations for a physio on a local trans Facebook page. It was my lesbian next-door neighbour, who follows that page in connection with her volunteer work, who responded. They have a two-year-old girl, and it turns out that her partner, who is the bio mother, needed pelvic floor physio after giving birth. They highly recommended someone who is only a half-hour drive away. They couldn't vouch for the physio being trans-friendly, but said she is at least queer-friendly.
I don't mind if people notice that I am trans, but I hate outing myself. I'd much rather they figure it out for themselves and then stay cool about it. However, in this case, it was necessary ("Reason for referral?"). The receptionist I spoke to on the phone seemed fine about it.
*sigh* This is what passes for progress in my life these days.