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AnnieB

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Feb 8, 2021
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Hello, I'm Anastasia, still relatively closeted, my wife, kids, and a few friends know. Started hrt July 2020. Knew I was trans by 12 years old, but as is the case with many my age, was not afforded the opportunity tp be myself until the 40s. Looking to increase my network of supportive people and this seems like a great place to do it.
 

Melanierose

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Hello, I'm Anastasia, still relatively closeted, my wife, kids, and a few friends know. Started hrt July 2020. Knew I was trans by 12 years old, but as is the case with many my age, was not afforded the opportunity tp be myself until the 40s. Looking to increase my network of supportive people and this seems like a great place to do it.
It is a good place to be where you can be honest with yourself about what you feel and want to do and you will support and experience from all the girls here.
I think the first step is important and you’ve started. Somehow you’ve got hrt. How did you manage that?
a year and you will be showing signs.
keep talking and reading blogs and join in the Friday or Saturday zoom chat gossip
 

OzGirl

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Welcome Anastasia! Your story is very similar to many on here, so no doubt you will get support! I was closeted until my mid 60's though I was free to be myself all the time I was at home for the last 20 years. But being stuck at home with the fear of discovery is all too familiar to me. I wasn't afraid of others knowing I was trans, but the affect on my loved ones. In the end, coming out and living full time was easier than I had expected, but still too much for my now ex wife.

I wish you good things on your journey, and I hope we can make it a bit easier for you! Where approximately in the world do you live??

Hugs,

Allie
 

Lexxi

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Welcome to our little Refuge Anastasia. I'm sure you'll find some new friends here. Most of us have been in the same boat at one point or another in our lifetimes, so we make good friends, because we understand what you're going through. Feel free to hop into any conversations you'd like to.

Lexxi
 

Karajo

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Jul 15, 2020
Messages
190
Hey lady! You have joined a wonderful community! I am in the same situation! My wife knows and is supportive and pretty amazing about it. Mtf started hrt in October. 39 soon to be 40 I am stuck at my job for a while longer till some bills are taken care of. Then I will be me! Hope I can help out anyway I can and welcome !!

Kàra!

Sent from my SM-N976V using Tapatalk
 

Linde

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Hello and welcome here. I am one of the women here, who have arrived at the endpoint of the transition, and am living full time as a female for several years now.

I hope we can help you with advise and guidance, because most of us have been at the place you are now.


Hugs
Linde
 

Confused

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Hi Anastasia,

You will find support here from a bunch of friendly people. Feel free to join in on our conversations.

Hugs,
Mike
 

TonyaJanelle

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Looking to increase my network of supportive people and this seems like a great place to do it.
Well thats what we aim to be here. Lots of other shenanigans to join (or avoid). Welcome to transrefuge!
 

Donica

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Hi Anastasia! Nice to meet you, and welcome to the Refuge. You'll fit right in here with our happy family, so don't be shy. See you around the forum.

Hugs!
 

AnnieB

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Feb 8, 2021
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It is a good place to be where you can be honest with yourself about what you feel and want to do and you will support and experience from all the girls here.
I think the first step is important and you’ve started. Somehow you’ve got hrt. How did you manage that?
a year and you will be showing signs.
keep talking and reading blogs and join in the Friday or Saturday zoom chat gossip
I was surprised at how quickly I was able to get on hrt, even now I'm not really sure how. Admittedly the VA had a lot to do with it, as soon as I was diagnosed with dysphoria (one visit) referrals were sent everywhere to help me transition. I actually had to slow down the process so that I could bring my wife (fiancee at the time) on board, I was given the script in Dec 2019, and waited 6 agonizing months to start.
 

AnnieB

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Feb 8, 2021
Messages
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Welcome Anastasia! Your story is very similar to many on here, so no doubt you will get support! I was closeted until my mid 60's though I was free to be myself all the time I was at home for the last 20 years. But being stuck at home with the fear of discovery is all too familiar to me. I wasn't afraid of others knowing I was trans, but the affect on my loved ones. In the end, coming out and living full time was easier than I had expected, but still too much for my now ex wife.

I wish you good things on your journey, and I hope we can make it a bit easier for you! Where approximately in the world do you live??

Hugs,

Allie
I'm in Phoenix, AZ
 

Monica

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Feb 1, 2020
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I was surprised at how quickly I was able to get on hrt, even now I'm not really sure how. Admittedly the VA had a lot to do with it, as soon as I was diagnosed with dysphoria (one visit) referrals were sent everywhere to help me transition. I actually had to slow down the process so that I could bring my wife (fiancee at the time) on board, I was given the script in Dec 2019, and waited 6 agonizing months to start.
Hi Anastasia, my name is Monica, but most call me Moni (like Bonnie). Do you go by Annie or Anastasia? Anyway, I'm a bit late in my welcome, as I've faced going to work this week as opposed to virtual work. These days, you get get on HRT quickly through 'informed consent.' They make sure you look stable, know the repercussions of the treatment and boom, there you go. Sadly, it's not like that everywhere, like in the UK. It is horrible how they treat trans people there. The waiting can be years. I guess your agonizing was wanting to start, but waiting for your partner to accept, or was it you, deciding to accept the reality of actually taking steps forward? Both can be hard!
 

Melanierose

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Hi Anastasia, my name is Monica, but most call me Moni (like Bonnie). Do you go by Annie or Anastasia? Anyway, I'm a bit late in my welcome, as I've faced going to work this week as opposed to virtual work. These days, you get get on HRT quickly through 'informed consent.' They make sure you look stable, know the repercussions of the treatment and boom, there you go. Sadly, it's not like that everywhere, like in the UK. It is horrible how they treat trans people there. The waiting can be years. I guess your agonizing was wanting to start, but waiting for your partner to accept, or was it you, deciding to accept the reality of actually taking steps forward? Both can be hard!
To be fair the nhs ( free treatment)in the uk has a 2-3 year wait for first appointment but if you go private it’s couple of months. Which is what I did so got all things sorted in a year ( gendergp)
People in uk are not used to paying privately so it doesn’t register in their brain as an option.
 

Monica

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Unfortunately, and I don't say this disrespectfully to you Melanie, many just can't afford it.
 

Melanierose

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Unfortunately, and I don't say this disrespectfully to you Melanie, many just can't afford it.
Oh I agree but I think there’s a mentality that free is the only route.
 

Linde

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Oh I agree but I think there’s a mentality that free is the only route.
Melanie, I think this is one of the pitfalls of the health insurances many European countries have. I see the same in Germany, if it is not free, it cannot be done.
This thought does not come up in the US, because most of anything is not free, and it is simply not affordable for many to go all the way you or I could go. I think part of the reason of the high suicide rate of trans people in the US is the hopelessness that they never will be able to afford any required surgery to become at least a semi passable person.

Hugs
Linde
 

Melanierose

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Melanie, I think this is one of the pitfalls of the health insurances many European countries have. I see the same in Germany, if it is not free, it cannot be done.
This thought does not come up in the US, because most of anything is not free, and it is simply not affordable for many to go all the way you or I could go. I think part of the reason of the high suicide rate of trans people in the US is the hopelessness that they never will be able to afford any required surgery to become at least a semi passable person.

Hugs
Linde
Yes thanks. You’re right. In uk it might take 3 years for some but it free and you can pay privately if you can afford it.
 

AnnieB

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Feb 8, 2021
Messages
4
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Hi Anastasia, my name is Monica, but most call me Moni (like Bonnie). Do you go by Annie or Anastasia? Anyway, I'm a bit late in my welcome, as I've faced going to work this week as opposed to virtual work. These days, you get get on HRT quickly through 'informed consent.' They make sure you look stable, know the repercussions of the treatment and boom, there you go. Sadly, it's not like that everywhere, like in the UK. It is horrible how they treat trans people there. The waiting can be years. I guess your agonizing was wanting to start, but waiting for your partner to accept, or was it you, deciding to accept the reality of actually taking steps forward? Both can be hard!
Hi Moni, I go by either still trying out other alternative versions as well, like Tae.

I realize I was lucky with how quickly things progressed, I follow a lot of people in the UK and I was basing my projected timelines on theirs. Plus since I was going though the US VA I expected additional hurdles that didn't exist.

I started both E and Spironolactone as soon as I had them in hand, but after a disagreement with my partner I stopped E for 6 months but continued the blockers. I was ready day one.
 
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