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NancyBalik

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 8, 2020
Messages
126
Why could you not use your standard last name, just with Nancy in front of it?

When I did my name and gender change, I had the chance to change everything, but I decided to keep my last name, because that keeps me in line with my family background. Now that I am in the process o change my birth certificate, I am glad that I did so.


Hugs
Linde
Linde, I think you forget that you are responding to a thread on the non-transitioning page. As noted, this was a number of years ago. I was well known in my professional community, have a recognizable (unusual) last name that would have produced my full name and professional address if googled. I am (and plan to remain out of respect to my agreement with my wife) tightly closeted. Nancy
 

Donna

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 25, 2020
Messages
295
Gender Pronouns
She, Her, Hers, Herself
Gender Identity
Female
Funny story about choosing my (fictional) last name. I’ve referred to my femme self to myself and on various forums as Nancy for many years. I went to purchase makeup at a Merle Norman studio a number of years ago with a primary goal of matching foundation with my skin tone. As I was checking out with over $100 in cosmetics, the gal who helped me asked for my name to put in their computer so that they’d have a record of my purchases to get the right colors next time. Made sense to me, but Nancy didn’t have a “last name.” I panicked a little bit (I was in male mode, btw, and was going to make a quick dash to my car, I’d let her leave some makeup on my face until I could get home, finish the job and dress). Nobody else was in the store in a small strip mall. All I could think of was Bali, then I realized that was the brand of undies I was wearing, so when she asked for me to spell it, I added a k. No shit! That’s how Nancy became a Balik. :) Nancy

You fooled me! I thought it was your real last name. Ball is not my real last name either but it's part of it. I am having a "ball" though.
 

NancyBalik

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 8, 2020
Messages
126
I want to re-visit this topic of envy. Sometimes I am just so preoccupied with thoughts about what it would be like to live full-time as a woman. I find myself wishing for things that will never be...I will never have real female parts, will never have smaller feet or a less masculine frame, never have beautiful hair, or a feminine voice, never have a wife who accepts my femininity. The best I can do is wear a few feminine things, try to appreciate what I have — which, overall, is one helluva lot. I live my life in a balance between “ never, never land” and acceptance of the reality I have. Mostly I am on the side of reality, but wishes die hard.... Nancy
 

Monica

Fight for self love!
Joined
Feb 1, 2020
Messages
2,390
Gender Pronouns
She, Her, Hers, Herself
Gender Identity
Female
Dear Nancy,
First of all, I hear what you are saying. I understand it too, I lived over fifty years with a very similar feeling. I am very sorry that this is what you must deal with. At times, it can be pushed to the side, but the frustration returns and it is maddening. The best thing I ever found was getting involved in a creative process. It is not a cure, but it can minimize the time that one thinks of gender! Hugs!
 

TonyaJanelle

Ubiquitous Moderator she/her/hers
Staff member
Joined
Dec 23, 2019
Messages
2,188
Gender Pronouns
She, Her, Hers, Herself
Gender Identity
Female
We can gaze upon women that are the epitome of feminity, and be envious. This is true. We can also count our blessings for what we have accomplished. Take stock of your your own life, and be thankful it has not been worse. Consider how many hundreds of thousands of people have not been as fortunate as yourself. How envious would they be of YOU?
Very true, and thankful for how far I've come is my usual state of mind. For whatever reason last few days I'm stuck in the "why is that not me" mode.
 

Linde

Adminstrator
Staff member
Joined
Dec 10, 2019
Messages
4,801
Gender Pronouns
She, Her, Hers, Herself
Gender Identity
Intersex
With my vocal cord surgery just around the corner, I get some fear of giving up my last bit from my former me. It is not very rational, because I will get a 100% female voice installed, and that for no cost to me. But I never will be able to speak in a low frequency voice ever again, I can do this currently, and that ability will be gone for good.
It is something like the "fear of flying" syndrome, I think.

Hugs
Linde
 
En Femme 728 x 90
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